The typerwriter glance

Refers to the very distinguishable glance used by guys when they talk to 2 girls who are friends. The glance is swift and the head movement quite annoying. If the guy's only interested in one of the two girls, he focuses his eyes and head only in her. So not to come across as rude or insensitive to the girl he's not interested in, he turns his head and gives her a quick glance. The glance lasts a second and back to the girl he is interested in. It repeats only at the end of each sentence. As soon as he's ready to carry on to the next sentence the head moves back to the girl he's really interested in. Hello? Can you now visualize such dick head moving back and forth like a carriage return in a typewriter?

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camera ommission

i would like to know what kind of energy bars and drinks federer and nadal used yesterday at the australia open final. the stuff that keeps them going during long and intense games. unfortunately the camera never zoomed in close enough to get a good look at it. don't pro athletes have sponsors for everything, including energy drinks?

tennis rackets, shoes, clothes, bags, towels, they all get close ups in order to advertise the sponsors but for some reason that's not the case with the energy drinks or food.

i wonder why...on a totally different note, what if the powerbars they eat came in the shape of the medal??

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why does federer cry so much?

i think he overdid it yesterday, maybe he should consider therapy sessions. i guess it's ok to show a bit of emotion that female fans love to see, but not to the point that it made nadal apologize for winning the game...this time federer's crying made me feel more sympathy for nadal. nadal should not have said i'm sorry for winning the open!

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noah's roofs

if you couldn't figure it out by reading the title, perhaps you never read the bible literally enough. a noah's roof is the concept of using a boat as a roof. it's not a joke.

strange as it may sound, it can actually help save people's lives in the developing world from devastating floods. a ladder inside the house leads to an attic-type door opening that gets everyone inside the boat. the boat is anchored on the ceiling in such a way that it detaches easily from it perhaps using pins or latches. villages with boat roofs can become tourist attractions and raise local income, for instance viewed from above on a helicopter ride or balloon as part of a safari or other tourist activity.

again, this is not a joke, it's an idea some people contemplate seriously. I think it must have had its origins in the bible :)

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Shorter Thoughts

I believe that people who succeed to write their thoughts in 2-3 lines should get higher rankings here. Shorter thoughts are easier to read usually.

What do you think?

Not a bad idea. I like reading very quick and short sentences. That way I can just scroll down and read more without having to click in a thought. Anyway I never click.. too busy for that. Generally I agree but some concepts cannot be included in 1-2 lines

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Bruno or Borat?

I find his 'movies' funny but I don't really think of them as movies. They feel like publicity stunts whose aim is to be funny by shocking people so that everyone talks about them after. Both Borat and Bruno would have made great TV series. I had a few good laughs watching Bruno but I think I liked Borat more.

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Treat me like I treat you

And I'll treat you like you treat me. You know what? If I treated everyone the way I wanted to be treated I would be going down on people all the time. If you also treat me like I treat you, we will definitely have great fun together. Let's just time it though so we don't bump our heads together :)

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people who wear crocs...

they go on and on about how comfortable they are, and how it's supposedly odor resistant because it's made out of some kind of anti-bacterial foam. great point, dipshits! you know what else crocs are resistant to? your getting laid just from the look of your shoes. that's right. they are very sex resistant, so if you want your shoes to serve as an excellent idiot barometer, keep wearing them.

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Isn't sex a masochistic activity??

Think about it. It involves effort, concentration, sometimes pain if not done right and above all you got to sweat a lot before you reach orgasm, not to mention that after all that hard work some people still won't experience it. Technically, it should be categorized as a masochistic activity. What's more, it's all hard-wired into our DNA. But we never think of it this way, what pleasurable hedonistic fools we all are... :D:D:D

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Why can't people easily accept display of intelligence

Even if a woman is naturally very pretty, she still puts on make-up to look more beautiful and attractive when she goes out. If she doesn't overdo it with the make-up and her dress, no man will think she is arrogantly flaunting her beauty despite the fact that most people think to themselves that she is pretty even without the make-up. The truth is that all men will welcome and enjoy the extra beauty she has put on display. Why can't that be the case with intelligence as well? I have noticed that men become very defensive when they meet someone who's smarter than them. Why can't the reaction to something as beautiful as a smart mind be the same as the reaction to something as beautiful as a pretty face?

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Hello, my head is coming out of a Giant Vagina

I'm sure a man invented this style, because it's damn near impossible to think of a combination of heads and vaginas that isn't red, but this shirt is proof that even an idea as inherently cool as giant vaginas and heads coming out of them can be made lame. I'm not sure I can resist commenting on the vagina if I see a woman in real life embellishing her neck and head like this :)

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one plug to rule them all..

yes please.. One plug for all the devices. Even better wireless plugs but I know it's not eary. So why not ONE plug for all the devices?

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Catering to Extreme Laziness

In the UK, you can now buy pre-boiled eggs in the supermarket. I've seen pre-made soup, rice, salads... but now eggs? How hard is it to put an egg in a pot of hot water for 5 minutes? Is this catering to extreme laziness or a very clever idea?

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A better strategy to capture Osama bin Laden

Instead of faking his death, how about Obama officially announces that Osama Bin Laden had been working for the CIA all along? Produce good fake internal documents that prove it and put on trial for treason and conspiracy to attack the US a few CIA agents (who will later be proven not guilty). If, as some people believe, 9/11 was an internal plot, then no one will want to give safe refuge to a CIA agent. Discredit him in the eyes of his protectors and let them kill him or deliver him to you. Isn't that a more effective conspiracy strategy?

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Fake Osama bin Laden's death

Obama, Brown, Merkel, Sarkozy, Zapatero, Berlusconi and Netanyahu make public statements that Osama Bin Laden is officially dead and leave it up to him to prove this otherwise. With some luck Osama will make the crucial mistake that will lead to his capture or real death. I suggest our leaders produce good fake visual material to prove Osama bin Laden's death. I see no problem killing anyone with Photoshop or other video editing software. After all, why use the technology only to prove the existence of weapons of mass destruction which don't exist and not for the fake killing of dangerous people who are still alive?

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Voting is Irrelevant

I am your leader. Do you think this applies to some countries? Sure it applies..latest example is Iran

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"ethnic unrest in china leads to mass arrests"

that's the front page title on cnn and then we read that 1,434 people were detained. that's a lot if you live in the us, but if you live in china whose population is more than 1 billion, how mass-ive is that? more impressive is the speed with which the police immediately cracked down on that "mass protest" than its actual mass. wondering what a chinese person thinks when he hears the number, does he really think it's a big protest or a small one? most probably he never hears of the protest and we will never know.

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The defeat (?) of American-style capitalism

Nobel prize economists are saying that this economic crisis will eventually pass but a big loser will be support for American-style capitalism. Does this mean that if the crisis happened during the Cold War the Soviet Union would have been the winner now? That's scary, isn't it? I'm curious to see what most people believe could have happened. If this crisis took place during the Cold War, do you believe that...

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swine flu parties. dare join them?

the mission of the party is to contract the virus before it becomes more virulent later on. are people nuts? maybe. but remember, during the 1918 spanish flu the first outbreak was mild but the next two ones were lethal and people who got sick in the first wave were less likely to get sick in the second and third wave. so the swine flu party idea is not new. it shares the same logic with the chickenpox parties where parents deliberately expose their children to playmates with chickenpox in order to allow them to have the once-only disease at a convenient time. now that you know the logic...

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Class Project Gone Cocktus!

Allegendly, the incident took place in an elementary school. The children were given green-ware pottery in the shape of clowns to make planters to take home to their parents. The chosen seed was cactus. When the seeds grew, the children were not allowed to take them home. The cactus plants were removed and small ivy replaced them before they could show them to their parents. What ever happened to teaching kids to appreciate male anatomy with a sense of humor? Hat off to the student who innocently asked the teacher why they should have to castrate the clowns...

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Could you be Borat for a day?

If someone offered you $10,000 to wear Borat's lime green "mankini" swimsuit for a day on the beach, would you do it? Apart from wearing the swimsuit, you won't be allowed to dress in his character, eg wear a wig and moustache, sunglasses. You won't be allowed to tell anyone why you're wearing it other than to say that you like wearing it.

Note: we're talking US dollars here.

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Post-it note economics

I am not sure if this falls under psychology, ecology or economics. My friend works for a company which is currently facing severe economic difficulties and management is frantic about reducing costs. Half-jokingly someone suggested that they use both sides of a post-it note. When I heard it, I was surprised but after giving it some thought I realized it's not such a bad idea. If we use less paper, that's good for the environment, isn't it? The only time I used both sides of a post-it note was when, having run out of sets, I had to make do with the last note in the pack. It never occurred to me to think of the environmental impact so I'm now reconsidering my one-side only use.

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How to improve literacy in America

How about passing a law that makes granting a driver's licence to a teenager conditional on finishing high school on a good grade? No diploma, no licence. Just a thought.

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There are few things worse than an untimely erection...

Add your own thoughts to the second part of the sentence if you like. Anyway, for me, the most obvious would be the untimely LACK of an erection...:D:D

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