Let casino CEOs run banks!

A friend of mine who used to work for a bank that doesn't exist anymore used to tell me that a banker's real job is actually very very boring. Take deposits, give loans, call on borrowers to ask them to pay etc etc Yes really boring stuff. So when a banker is really bored he dreams of being in exotic places doing exotic things and then allows his in-house trader to design exotic trades and instruments for him. He used to say the only way to add spice to his job was to let bankers gamble selling it as 'financial innovation' which they did and here we are. So I wonder why not let casino CEOs run the remaining banks that are left? They're good at what they do, aren't they? When you go to a casino you always end up losing your money up to your pain point but the point is that the house Never goes bankrupt!! That's way better for the rest of us who are not gamblers, isn't it?

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The GIA Bill of Regulations

How about we name the new laws that will be drafted to regulate the financial system in the US as the GIA Bill of Regulations? GIA will be the reverse of AIG's initials. The innovation in the acronym will be its dual use and multiple i-substitutes. How you read out GIA will depend on how effective the new laws will be in containing future greed and irresponsibility. If the GIA Bill of Regulations fails to restrain gambling and irresponsible risk, people can refer to it as Grow Irresponsibly America. The adverb 'Irresponsibly' can be substituted by any such words as illegitimately, illegally, insanely, inscrutably, incomprehensibly, idiotically, inattentively, ill-advisedly etc.

On the other hand, if the bill produces a stable, well-regulated financial system, people can refer to it as Grow Intelligently America with such i-substitutes as intelligently, insightfully, ideally, indefatigably, impressively etc. The name of the agency that will supervise the laws will be called, what else, Greed Intelligence Agency.

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